weaning

**this post is about breastfeeding. consider yourself warned.

in my last post i talked about my reflection over the past year of mommyhood. along with this comes my thoughts, experiences, and love/hate relationship with nursing. i can say that evie & i accomplished way more than i had initially planned on. i gave myself a 6 month goal mark. at 6 months we were still going strong so i decided to shoot for a year. and we have done just that!

i've never had that "overwhelming warm fuzzy feeling" that a lot of mom's talk about when they nurse. it was a practical decision. do it for evie's well-being & do it because its cheaper. dont get me wrong, i LOVE my daughter to the ends of the earth. but nursing...it was so much more difficult than i ever imagined. here i have been giving up so much to continue to be a nursing mom. my body. my time. my work day. my social life. sigh...

in the past couple months nursing has become even more challenging since evie is so active & mobile. she will climb all over me, pinch me, hit me, pull my hair...leaving me frustrated and discouraged. women don't talk about this. it is taboo (similar to postpartum depression). women only talk about the joys of breastfeeding rather than the pains.

this past week i was able to eliminate the middle of the day feeding (which was primarily pumping since i am a working mom). i honestly believe pumping spiked the hate side of my relationship with breastfeeding. medela has done an incredible job of making the pump discreet and stylish...but there is something completely unnatural about hooking up like a cow 1-4 times a day. i envy the stay at home mom who never has to hear the motor of a breastpump...two more feedings to drop over the next couple weeks and we are homefree! we made it evie.

on to LOVE side of nursing. there is nothing more rewarding than raising a child. there is no way to even begin to describe how your heart can BURST with love for them. amidst of all of my frustration with breastfeeding there would always be a glimmer of hope - and that would be in the moments when evie would look up at me and smile. or in the middle of the night when her sweet eyes could barely stay open and she looked so peaceful. those moments are the ones i will always treasure.

evie, i adore everything about you. your sweet smile. your sweet laugh. the way you point your finger to draw our attention to you. the times you cant help yourself and have to dance to the music. the moments when you lay your head on my shoulder to get a quick snuggle in. how you jump for joy when we come get you out of your crib. your baby banter in your absolutely adorable little voice. but most of all the "overwhelming warm fuzzy feeling" i get just by looking at you.

one year ago

i feel overwhelmed with the thought that evie is going to be ONE in less than three weeks. i've been doing a lot of reflecting over the past year and enjoying all of the memories 2010 has captured. this time last year i was waddling around seattle trying to prepare for the new adventure of mommy-hood. my ribs were constantly being poked and prodded on the inside by my sweet baby girl. i had no idea what to expect and the anticipation, at times, felt like too much to handle. i wanted time to speed up so i could meet her.

and now this year...my body still serves as a jungle gym for evie to climb around on :) i love soaking in every moment with evie, watching her figure out the world around her. i am overjoyed when she bursts in to laughter about the silliest things. but now, unlike last year, i want time to SLOW down. i don't want to miss a single moment and it is going so quickly.

what a difference a year makes.

check out last year's blogpost from december 8, 2009.

happy birthday daddy!

erik turned twenty-eight today & we had a great celebration with friends & family. even though it was erik's bday, he still cooked up a fabulous meal. he got a new electric smoker for his birthday & tested it out on us. the smoked pork was delicious for the pork tacos we all inhaled! yummmmmm....

the kiddos ran around and kept us all laughing. here are some fun pictures from the evening.

uncle erik, declan & asher

grandpa lovin' on evie

deckers

mini-andrew (aka asher)

baby evie

eleven months old

there is a cute little girl taking over my baby's body. i have so many emotions knowing that my sweet evie is going to be one next month. this chattery little cutie pie is on the move constantly! she has so much personality - we just can't get enough!

• evie points toward everything & says "look" to get our attention
• she has learned how to throw a mini-tantrum if we take something she wants
• evie likes to play copy-cat with facial expressions, hand gestures, noises & words
• her hair has started to curl
• evie can stand on her own - although she's incredibly cautious
• evie is an excellent eater and seems to enjoy almost everything we put in front of her (including spaghetti)
• she somehow managed to figure out how to climb stairs
• her top teeth will likely make their appearance soon
• she knows that a remote must be pointed toward a tv & that a cell phone goes next to your ear
• after a possible growth spirt - evie is starting to wear 9-12 month clothing

family

we all had a wonderful weekend with family. evie got to meet her grandma tammy, aunt kayla, & cousins kiara & spencer! we all loved every minute of catching up...even though we picked up right where we left off. :) we spent saturday afternoon at the children's museum and had a blast! here are some pictures from our fun weekend!

dancing queen

evie has been standing on her own all week and we FINALLY caught it on video! she is little miss independent and decides when she will do this even when we try to get her to stand. she is stubborn like her father ;) i think she gets the head-banging from her rockstar dad as well!

savings

i am all about finding a good deal on things. and my friend jena & i just discovered the best diaper savings i have seen yet! amazon.com has come out with a new program called amazon moms. if you sign up for amazon moms, you get free 2 day shipping on ALL baby gear. which is awesome! i LOVE avoiding errands! so if they want to deliver wipes & diapers to my doorstep within 2 days i will let them!

the real savings is when you do the amazon's "subscribe & save" program on top of amazon moms. this program offers an extra 15% off AND free shipping on items (diapers, wipes, papertowels, laundry detergent, etc) that you use frequently. you select how often you want it the item to be delivered (1, 2, 3, or 6 months - and you can cancel anytime or change the frequency of delivery!). AND as an amazon mom you get ANOTHER 15% off! that's 30% off of diapers, wipes, and other baby items. the diapers i normally order once a monthish were normally $40! and now they are $28! are you kidding me!?!?!? and free shipping. so all the moms out there - take advantage and save yourself an errand!

erik & i have always LOVED amazon.com - but this just took it to a whole new level. :)

SIGN UP AND SAVE!!

Subscribe & Save & Amazon mom